April 20, 2009 at 7:03 pm (Uncategorized)

I haven’t written in here in a long time!  I got really busy because of school, and sometimes life is too complicated and you’d rather not think about it, let alone write about it. 

These are some random thoughts that I have had lately….

In the past few days, I have acquired 2 nasty bruises in addition to hurting my lower back .  My back doesn’t hurt all the time, just during certain movements like getting out of the car or taking off my pants.  The pain is so severe and startling that it causes me to make uncomtrollable animal like grunt-moans.  It’s really quite embarassing.  When I need to get out of my car, I wait until there is no one around to see me struggle or hear my non human sounding “UGGGGGHHH. MM. FUCK!” 

I realized that while all of these injuries happened around the same time, I have no idea how any of them happened.  I certainly would have remembered something that caused a baseball sized welt on my thigh.  I thought about it for a while, trying to remember what happened.  I came up with nothing, which led me to the conclusion that they all must have happened during the “diarrhea incident.” 

While being faced with a 2 year old covered in his own feces, I turned into a sort of machine.  Of course my natural reaction was disgust, but I knew that in order to beat the poop, I had to act quickly.  I had to give the child a bath, which I have never done – this also required removing (touching) his shitty clothes and diaper which had pretty much disentigrated by this point.  The kid knew he was covered in poop and was hiding from me.  I had to trick him  into coming close to me so i could grab him.   I grabbed him and held him as far away from me as possible.  My only mission was poop removal and clean-up.  I think my senses shut down during this process because they were slowing me down.  I could have easily puked everywhere, which would have contributed to the bodily waste fluid party that was already happening.  The only sense that was working were my eyes.  I will never forget the sight of all that poop.  I’m pretty sure that it was during this window of time – when I became the Terminator of Feces – that I sustained my injuries.  My body just couldn’t process pain because it didn’t recognize any activity that didn’t contribute to operation poop removal. 


So, today when I was driving  back from my observations I saw a prison bus on the highway.  At first I saw the flashing green and red lights.  And then I realized it was a prison bus.  It was going pretty fast in the left lane – faster than me in my little car.  This caused me to have many questions.  Were the prisoners in a hurry?  Who was on that bus?  They were going really fast and I tried to look into the windows but they had bars over them so it was hard to see.  I pictured a crazed serial killer chained down to the floor.  I was scared that he would escape and kill me because I was driving behind the bus.  Why were the lights flashing on the bus?  Was it just to notify other drivers that this bus was in fact, filled with prisoners?  I think the giant sign and the bars on the windows gave that away. 

I tried to get away from that bus.  It was going really fast for a bus and it made me uneasy because it was definitely in a hurry.    WHERE?  Where were the incarcerated people going in such a hurry???  And why do they get to use special lights?  Oh my god, I bet the bus was hijacked by a prisoner!  That has to be it!  I can’t think of any other logical explanation. 

I don’t like prison buses.


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